Thursday, May 26, 2005


I went with Pete and Katie today to collect the stuff that was in Laurie's Jeep when she died. It was great to be with Pete and Katie....but what a retarded way to spend a Wednesday.

So yeah...I don't have anything profound to say (because normally this blog is filled with Aesopian wisdom...right?). I don't want to go into great detail about the stuff that was in her car because a) I don't want to say something I'm not supposed to and b) I'm really not interested in sharing every little thought I had today. Sorry.

But I will tell you this...

I can understand Right Now. I know that Right Now Laurie is gone and she's not coming back. That, I can comprehend. But to think that I was a pallbearer at her funeral in mid-March....that still doesn't seem real. And to think that I wont see her turn 25...or 30...or be able to celebrate with her when the Cubs (someday) win the World Series...all that still doesn't make sense to me.

Her upcoming birthday will be hard, and I think I'm ready for that...because that's in the Right Now. But I'm not ready to spend the rest of my life without one of my best friends.

Will I ever be ready for that?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

What is so "retarded" about that???

May 26, 2005 9:47 AM  
Blogger dbrown said...

What's the problem? That I used the word 'retarded' or that I didn't have a fun time picking up my dead friend's belongings?

May 26, 2005 10:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My best friend died 8 years ago...still not over it; still think about her everyday. It doesn't go away. Wish I could be more encouraging...sorry.

May 26, 2005 3:12 PM  
Blogger Jackie R. said...

Drew, I was actually going to comment on the work retarded - because it made so much sense in that context - Glad that you guys didn't have to wait 2 years but what a HARD thing to do... and it is a retarded way to spend a Wednesday... Thanks for sharing your heart.

May 26, 2005 4:03 PM  
Blogger chryl said...

Retarded is defined in Webster's as:
1 : to slow up especially by preventing or hindering advance or accomplishment : IMPEDE
2 : to delay academic progress by failure to promote
synonym see DELAY

All very appropriate, huh?

We all feel so awkward and slow wading through the tangle of grief, with its conflicting emotions and endless questions. We've been impeded, slowed up, and delayed in real and painful ways. I couldn't have said it better.

May 26, 2005 6:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No one said you were supposed to have a fun time, but it definitely was not "retarded" .... if you check the definition from "Little Miss Know-It-All" you were not impeded at all on Wednesday... In fact, it was quite the opposite... you were able to get the stuff back without waiting 2 years like suspected... that does not sound like a delay in progress to me, thus I repeat, what is so retarded about that???

May 27, 2005 8:55 AM  
Blogger dbrown said...

I'm done talking about this.

Anonymous, you can e-mail me if you want to continue this off the blog.

May 27, 2005 9:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know what I find amusing? The fact that a blog is supposed to reflect personal opinions and feelings about the person writing it. If someone takes exception to something written, instead of beating it to a bloody pulp, just don't read the blog about retarded!

May 27, 2005 10:22 AM  
Blogger dbrown said...


Also, Laurie used the word 'retarded' many bout we pick on her too?

May 27, 2005 10:29 AM  
Blogger Bigger than Me said...

I think I am going to listen to one of my favorite CDs, one that Laurie made for me when we went to Ohio last summer. I gotta tell you, we really rocked out hard to the first song on it..."Let's Get Retarded" by the Black-Eyed Peas.


May 27, 2005 11:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree!

So, if Bigger Than Me took exception to what was written about the "abandonment" issue in her mother's blog, or all of you take exeption from the comments people have made at the funeral, in public etc... DON'T BEAT IT TO DEATH ON BLOGS.... It only reflects personal opinions and feelings of the person/people commenting, SO DON'T READ THEM IF YOU DON'T LIKE THEM... IT'S A TWO-WAY STREET!!

May 27, 2005 1:20 PM  
Blogger dbrown said...

Oh please.

You honestly expect Katie not to say anything after someone has the audacity to minimize what her father did to her family? Give me a fucking break.

I never knew Denny. Laurie and I became close friends about a year after he died so I can't speak firsthand on that issue.

However, I remember the conversations I had with Laurie about it. Barb has told me the story several times. I'm not clueless.

The anonymous family member who made those idiotic comments on Barb's blog had every right to be corrected and informed about the truth.

This conversation is getting retarded.

May 27, 2005 2:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've been following Lauries website for quite sometime, never made a comment before;I'm an old friend of Scotts.Who is this anonymous person?!!!!!Just be quiet! My heart burns for Lauries friends family and all who she loved. I agree if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. After following all your bloggs I want to be a better person. A better love friend daughter sister mother...from a very non religious being wishing all of you constant strength

June 05, 2005 11:09 PM  

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